<%@LANGUAGE="JAVASCRIPT" CODEPAGE="1252"%> Poetry by Rogers

 


The Boner Collector

by Chris Rogers

 

She surrounded herself with flypaper
in hopes that she could catch herself a man.

Every day, she would catch one or two,
but the ones that got stuck on the
paper were never quite right.
They’d be missing a foot or two,
or the penis would be too small,
or occasionally not there at all.
Sometimes they would spit at her from the paper,
or they would just die trying to escape their fate.

She would devour them, one limb at a time.
She always saved the eyes for last,
it made her feel less alone when
she had someone to look in the eyes.

After years of papering her surroundings,
she got sick of all the low-quality kills she was managing.
They were neither satisfying nor tasty,
so she stopped putting out the paper.

Instead, she baked pies and cookies
and sat them right outside her door.
She waited and she watched and little by little,
they would come up and take a bite of her offerings.
The new kills that came were of a better quality,
so she didn’t mind when they stayed too
long or took a little more than their share.

Eventually, her plan netted her
too many kills so she had a surplus.
She gave some away to her girlfriends
and stored the best in jars in her pantry.
She collected so many that they began
to gather dust and went bad,
turning to a gray sludgy-mush
that she had to flush down the toilet.

 


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© Rogers, 2005

 

Chris Rogers is a native Ohioan that relocated to southern California 10 years ago. She lives in San Diego with her husband, two dogs and an uppity cat. She works in short stories, poetry and creative non-fiction. When she is not slaving away at the keyboard, she enjoys camping in the wilderness, jaunts to Las Vegas to gamble and volunteering as a literacy tutor. She is currently working on her first chapbook, “Bipolar Poems” and pursuing a Bachelors Degree in English. She keeps a small, but solid, group of friends that put up with her many eccentricities and mood swings. Her only vice is a good cup of coffee.